You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey


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You and Your Teenager, Understanding the Journey

You might start letting them walk to school on their own or leaving them at home for 10 minutes while you pop to the shop. As they earn your trust and get used to their new independence, they can then take bigger steps, like going into town with a friend or catching a bus on their own. Homework can be a flashpoint as your child enters their teens, with the volume building as they move up to secondary school.

Social media is a minefield for kids, with issues from friendship dramas to online grooming to contend with. Banning your child from social media is unrealistic and is likely to result in them using it behind your back. Dirty coffee cups in their bedroom, soggy towels on the bathroom floor… Teens can be difficult to live with, but relaxing your standards a little and letting some things go can be the difference between a harmonious household and an explosive one.

If we can treat them as adults in the making and be on the same team, we can give them what they need most: love, respect and understanding. Start your trial for FREE today! Access thousands of brilliant resources to help your child be the best they can be. Feeling daunted by the prospect of parenting a teenager? Putting in some groundwork before your child hits their teens could ease their passage through this troublesome time.

Kids Health Info : Challenging behaviour – teenagers

Login or Register to add to my wishlist. Increase their independence Most teenagers crave independence , but letting go of your hold on your child can be nerve-wracking.

Learn their learning style Homework can be a flashpoint as your child enters their teens, with the volume building as they move up to secondary school. Be social media aware Social media is a minefield for kids, with issues from friendship dramas to online grooming to contend with. We're always going to have different tastes. I wear crop tops and my dad's like, Katie!

We should be allowed to try on a dress for a party and see how we feel in it.

Common questions our doctors are asked

I'm not going to want her to show off, but she should wear something she feels good in, and so should I. For me, the secret to having a happy teen is giving them space and freedom — without that, there is no fun and happiness. But you also need to find common ground — with my dad, I watch crime thrillers; with my mum, Downton Abbey. It's good to have a thing you can bond over. Whenever I get told off by my mum, she gives me these really long lectures. Seriously, they are so long that by the end of them I can't even remember what we were talking about.

When it comes to my dad, he's much more short and snappy. To tell you the truth, my mum is softer than my dad — my dad is more scary — but I'd still rather be told off by my dad. My mum worries a lot about my future. I don't know why she worries — it's just how parents are. I ask my parents for advice if I need help with my work.

One time, ages ago, I was being bullied at school, and my mum helped get it sorted out. My advice for parents is, if you want something doing, don't constantly go on about it, just say it once. If you say it multiple times, we just won't feel like it. And if you need to punish your teenagers, I'd say stop them playing computer games or take away their phones — teens use their phones to text their friends all the time, and if you take it away, they will learn from their mistake. Sometimes parents try to engage with their kids and it goes wrong.

One time my mum was texting me, using all this youth language. Has someone stolen my mum's phone?

When I'm going to a party, Mum wants me to call her when I get there, after an hour, when I leave. She says she wants me to have my independence, then takes it away by asking for the phone number of the place I'm going. Teenagers are hypocritical about this, too: our need for independence changes by the minute.

Arguments can build up over stupid little things, and technology is a very big deal. I have to put aside my homework and help my mum log on. Then if I close my door and go on my laptop, she worries about what I might be doing online. She has influenced me with her drive and passion, but she can be embarrassing, too. When I'm with my friends, she tries to suss out whether I'm going out with any of them. They might still be at my house, putting on their shoes, and she'll ask, "Is that your girlfriend?

I probably edit my life for her benefit: I just don't seem to mention the wrong people. My mum says things like, "When I'm not here, no one will be able to run your bath.

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e-book You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey

Parents remember the way they grew up and think it's still the same, but it's not. Now, most teens have mobiles, so it's easier to keep in contact. As for stranger danger, kids are pretty mature these days — they know when someone isn't right. Drink and drugs are clearly an issue. When I was in year seven, we never talked about drugs, but now I'm in year 12 I know younger kids take drugs and it makes you think, do their parents know?

It's definitely something parents should talk about, but you also have to realise that your child is going to experiment. All you can do is make sure they are aware of the consequences. You can't go everywhere with your child; can't babysit them through these years. I can talk to my parents about anything to do with school.

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As you grow up, your friends become your second parents, but when things are getting out of hand, your parents have the final say. Well, it needs to be talked about. I was in year seven, on my computer, when my mum and dad came to talk to me about it. It was cringey. I was embarrassed as hell. But now I'm older, I'm glad we had the conversation. Parents should talk to their kids about sex, but don't scare them, don't go into details. They told me to be sensible, not take risks. It's all about balance.


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You have to know you can talk to your parents about anything. Parents have to trust their teens to do the right thing, but if they don't, take a step back and still be there for them. I'm studying broadcast and digital communication at the Brit School, and I want to work as a presenter in the future. I've always been the less academic one. My sister is a year older and she's already thinking of which university she's going to. My parents have always been very supportive. The most annoying thing they do is badger me to get a job — it's almost like them always asking about it means I won't do it.

You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey
You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey
You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey
You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey
You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey
You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey
You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey You and Your Teenager: Understanding the Journey

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